We’ve all heard the age-old saying, “until something changes, nothing changes”. One of my mentors used to tell us repeatedly that “until the pain of changing becomes greater than the pain of remaining the same, nothing changes.”
Usually it takes coming to grips with the stark reality of our present, most often in the form of some kind of crisis, for us to want to make positive changes regarding the people, places and things with which we interact most often. Instead of reacting to crises, we can be proactive and intentional in our approach, employing what I’d like to call "Personal Development Risk Management", to alleviate and avoid unnecessary moments of crisis and promote emotionally healthy, stress-free living.
Investing in your personal development is not just fanciful woo-woo; it is imperative for improving your mindset and setting yourself up for successful relationships with people in your network.
Here are 5 easy personal development risk management tips to help you de-stress your day-to-day life:
1: Shut down the drama in your life because it’s unhealthy. Arguing and fighting creates dis-ease.
This does not equate being a doormat. It means knowing your worth and knowing when to let the frivolous and counterproductive go. You are not required to attend every single argument to which you are invited. Stay away from gossip (especially in the workplace), negativity, and people who are chronic complainers as these behaviors have a negative impact on your general health and your mental and emotional well-being.
Action: Train your mind to see the good in others, and to find opportunity where there appears to be obstacles. Don’t entertain unnecessary drama, whether it is self-generated, or brought to you by others.
2: Stay away from negative, selfish, energy-draining relationships that do not honor you, or even worse, use you, abuse you and take advantage of your kindness.
No one is asking you to be a martyr. Don’t buy into anyone’s negativity or guilt trips. If you know your own worth, it will be difficult for others to manipulate you into doing and being things you don’t want to do or be.
Action: Honor your “no”. Your “no” comes from a place that is just as sacred as your “yes”. Respect yourself enough to learn how to say “no” without feeling guilty for having done so.
3: Don’t attempt to change others.
There’s enough work to do on yourself. Develop relationships where all parties can grow. Ask yourself, what is it about this person/situation that’s bothering me so much? Often, the answer is within ourselves, not the other person. That person is getting under your skin because you have violated your own sense of morality or self-respect about the situation.
Action: Ask yourself: Am I acting out of ego or love? Always choose love.
4: Create an atmosphere of mutual respect, love and appreciation.
Be mindful of your relationships and how you treat others. Free yourself from inner chaos by meditation, relaxation, and stillness. Keep lines of communication open and honest. Remember that passive aggressive behavior is still aggressive behavior.
Action: Ask yourself: How am I called to be of service today? Then, look for opportunities to be of loving service to others. Instead of passive aggression, try being assertive, and say what you mean to get the results you intend. If what you are about to say cannot be said with respect and honesty, don't say it. Wait until you are calm enough to have a civil conversation and leave cynicism and sarcasm out of it.
5: Create a sanctuary where you can live in peace, relax your mind, revive your spirit and renew your purpose.
What you create inside of yourself will manifest outside yourself. Create a physical space that supports your mission of living a stress-free, peaceful life. Your home should be a place of relaxation and peace, not clutter and chaos.
Action: As you strive for inner clarity by developing rituals and being mindful of your relationships, work on bringing organization and beauty to your home.
For more Clarity Coaching tips, find me at asa-mariclaritycoach.com, and follow along on social media @wineoutofwater